Make Your Bed First Thing Every Morning!

Commencements have an interesting tradition.  College Presidents ask a successful person to give an address, for which they receive an honorary doctorate degree.  The speech contains meaningful bromides to reassure parents that their kids are smart, above average, and will provide a good return on their investment.  I can’t remember who spoke at my commencement or what he said.  It got me to thinking.  Is there a reasonable return on a college’s investment in commencement speakers? 

By happenstance, I watched Sheryl Sandburg^’s 2017 address at Virginia Tech.  It was light hearted, warned the students that they would have successes and failures and those needed to be lived to the fullest.  She asked the graduates a simple question: “What will you be thankful for?”  Thanks to You Tube and lots of retirement time, I watched several more commencement addresses, fifteen or twenty of them

The President of Harvard introduced Bill Gates, listing his accomplishments and how he changed the world.  He jokingly asked how much more he could have accomplished had he stayed two more years and finished his degree.  Bill talked about how the students would face the world, succeed sometimes, and fail sometimes; but if they had resilience and persevered, they would be successful.

Admiral William McRaven, head of the Navy Seals, spoke to the graduates at the University of Texas a few years ago.  Seal training is rigorous beyond belief, designed to weed out all but the best; those who persevere.  He listed ten lessons he learned while becoming a Seal.  A first step to success was that you should make you bed first thing each morning.  It gets the day started with an accomplishment that helps you persevere. And, at the end of a day of near failures or successes, you can collapse into a nice clean, comfortable bed. 

Matt Damon told MIT graduates that they needed to turn toward the problems they see in the world and do something about them.  He works at bringing clean water to isolated communities in Africa.  Success comes when he is resilient and perseveres.

Robert DeNero faced the graduates of NYU TISH School of the Arts congratulated the students, and then told them they were screwed.  They chose a profession in which failure happens daily: auditions with no callback, galleries that don’t accept their paintings, movies that can’t find backers, and scripts nobody wants to use.  Only those with the resiliency to persevere will be successful.  His is among the “ten best” commencement speeches listed on the web, along with President Obama, Randy Prause, J. R. Rawlings and others.  

David McCoullough, Jr., famously told Wellesley High School graduates they weren’t special, they were among a group of 300,000 other seniors across the country graduating that month, that there was no center of the universe, so they couldn’t be it.  He told them they were among millions who will strive for success and that if they persevere and follow their dream they will make it.  All the speakers, in one way or another, say the same thing: life is tough but you have to dream, you are blessed, you may fail, but if you persevere, if you are resilient, you can succeed.  Hang in there.  Just do it!

 What does success look like?  When you search for the meaning of success, few people equate it to the dictionary definition: money and power.  Arianna Huffington says it has to do with well being, wisdom, wonder, and giving.  Maya Angelou spoke of liking what you do and how you do it.  Churchill suggested that to be successful you had to go from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.  Robert Reich, in his 2014 Last Lecture at U.C Berkeley, talked about how success and failure are not the issue, but resilience is.  Success comes to those who can take failure after failure, continue the quest, and turn it into a positive. 

I consulted with two groups of CEO’s, founders and presidents, of their own companies.  All were very successful business people with affluent lifestyles.  At one meeting, I asked them to list ten things they wanted to do before they died; a bucket list.  All wanted to spend more time with their family, travel the world, sit on nonprofit boards, and more.  Not one of them listed anything to do with business, with power, or with money.  Those were simply a means to an end, a way to measure achievement in their chosen field.  Money and power didn’t define success for those company presidents. 

The question remains – what will be our contribution, for what will we be thankful, for what will we be remembered, will we be resilient, will we persevere.  Teachers influence thousands of people over a career.  Researchers find cures for disease and engineers build great buildings designed by great architects.  Social workers help millions of people get through the day.  Pastors counsel troubled parishioners.  Bill Gates transformed the world with Microsoft.  Steve Jobs changed the world again with the Iphone.  Martin Luther King brought a nation a new idea of humanity.  President Obama proved that government could be a help rather a hindrance.  Millions of people go about their business every day contributing to their world in small and large ways.  They are all successful.  They raise families, they master their trade or craft, write books, volunteer, nurse the sick, entertain others, provide needed goods and services, manage governments, or work for companies that improve lives.  Other millions, however, work only for the money and the power they can accumulate, but don’t contribute.  For what will they be thankful, what will be their legacy?  Perhaps Nelson Mandela said it best: “the greatest glory in living lies not in never failing, but in rising every time we fall.”

Are commencement speakers worth the investment?  I doubt it!  But, I’m a traditionalist.  What would commencement be without a speaker?

By the way, I found a copy of my commencement program.  The speaker was Harry L. Bain.  I don’t remember what he said, but I’ll bet he told us we needed to be resilient and persevere!  And it all starts with making your bed first thing in the morning!